About Me

My photo
Harlem, New York, United States
At a very young age I knew I wanted to do anything that involved getting my "opinion" on life out there. I would tell true stories and made up stories. I would sing and dance. I would conduct interviews and draw pictures. I just needed an outlet. My plans were to become a talk show host, until one day my mother pointed out that it would mean I'd have to do a lot of listening too. I realized talk show host wasn’t really going to work since what I really wanted was to talk and have people listen. In time I had to admit that I had much more to say than most people had time to listen to. So, I started to keep a journal. My journals helped me to formulate my thoughts and emotions but I still had no audience. Hopefully this blog will give me that audience. Blessed Be

Monday, April 9, 2012

New Blog Address

I am now at http://laladysage.wordpress.com/
It's a work in progress so please be patient.
It should be easier for everyone to post comments on the new site.
All of my old posts are already reposted there, along with past comments.

Let me know what you think

Blessed Be

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

A Brief Description...

Just before Ash Wednesday a friend asked if I was going to church to get my ashes. I told him no. He asked why and I answered with a shrug. He then asked if I was Catholic and I said no but I did enjoy going to church with my family sometimes. He then asked what I was if not Catholic. I just looked at him and knew the conversation was coming; I’ve known this person for over two years and had avoided this topic so far. I simply smiled and said, “I’m Pagan.” 
With a straight face he said, “But that’s evil. You worship Satan.”
This person lives in my building and works downtown near my office, we tend to run into one another often. Though we don’t hang out socially we have had serious conversations about family, work and even politics. I’ve met his wife and children. He’s met my family. For at least a year he’s tried to convince me to go out with a friend of his because he thinks “I’m too special to be single.” He’s even been in my home. Yet he made a statement that could not have made any sense to him had he thought it out first.
I asked him, “Do you think I’m evil?”  He stared at me. Literally he seemed not to know what to say. So I asked again, “You’ve known me for how long? Do you think I’m evil?” Then he answered, “No.” But said that he knows what a Pagan is and they believe in Satan AND Satan is evil. I then told him to think about what he was saying and to go online and get some information. I told him that if he still thinks I might be evil then he doesn’t have to be friends with me any longer but if he had any questions he’d like me to answer or if he just wanted to hear from ME what my beliefs are then I would talk to him about it.
It’s been weeks and he hasn't brought the subject up again. I am curious as to what he did in order to still feel comfortable around me but not curious enough to ask.

The label of being Pagan just puts people on the defensive. Yet, I can’t lie about who I am.
I take my spirituality seriously but I’m so much more. I’m a woman. I’m Latina. I’m Boriqua. I’m a daughter. A sister. A niece. A cousin. A friend. I’m a native New Yorker and a world traveler. I’m a reader and a writer. I’m a teacher and a student. And, lately I'm quite the hockey fan. I’m smart, silly, stubborn and kind. I’m head-strong and sensitive. I'm argumentative yet supportive. I’m independent but like to be taken care of. I am loyal, honest, dependable and sometimes a bit of a flake. I have a bad temper yet I'm pretty forgiving. I can curse you out but I'm free with compliments too. I am so many things yet one label (a misrepresented one at that) often leads people to judge me before ever getting to really know anything about me.

Just to be clear… Paganism has a broad definition ~ see links below ~ so I am in no way saying that this is THE definition of a Pagan. It is simply a brief description of what being a Pagan personally means to me.

I believe in a God and a Goddess both male and female energies.
I believe in nature and the cycles of life in all of its forms.
I believe in spells and prayers.
I believe in group and Solitary worship.
I believe I can connect to spirit by sitting in a forest, a park or on my fire escape.
I believe in treating people the way we ourselves would like to be treated.
I believe in Karma. (And the Wiccan Rede)
I believe in counting my blessings.
I believe in freedom of choice and because of that I believe everyone has the right to their very own spirituality. I do not claim my way is THE way.
I believe in Jesus Christ. This can be a sticking point with my Pagan and my Christian friends alike but I feel he was the son of God in the way we are all children of the Gods. I believe he existed if not as one man then as a representative of a spiritual movement. He was special because of his loyalty and love for his one God. He did give his life, the same as many others have because of their beliefs.
I believe in being informed and educated before judging especially when it comes to the life choices of others. We may have differences of opinion, I’m talking about spirituality here yet this holds true for anything. We haven’t walked the same path as anyone else so judging without really knowing is only going to keep both sides ignorant.
We all judge. I know that. It’s how we gauge what we like or don’t like. It’s how we decide things. It’s how we choose who and what surrounds us. We’re free to “opt out” if we aren’t comfortable with something but we don’t have to condemn. My point is KNOW why you make the choices you do. Think of the reality of things before blindly following others and placing labels.
I’d much rather someone NOT like me because I’m stubborn or talk too much or because of something I’ve actually done to them than because of a label I've been given. If you’re going to judge me then let it be for who I really am not for who you THINK I am.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Itty Bitty Writers Block

I've been having a really hard time writing lately.
I've been able to write in my journal but I haven't been happy with anything I've written for my blog. I received some really good advice from several different friends about getting through writers block and all had their benefits but I still couldn't put anything on paper worth posting.
So, I decided to write a list of all the reasons I didn't want to post what I'd tried to write. I found a few reasons but only two really stood out. One is that I've gotten lots of compliments about my blog. Sounds like a good thing, right? It is! The thing is... You can say I'm not used to being that good at something. I'm not trying to sound down on myself... believe me, I get my share of compliments.  Mostly the compliments are about who I am, just not really for what I can do. And, there is a difference. I get compliments for standing up for my beliefs, for being independent, for being strong, or funny, or thoughtful, for being a good friend, sister or daughter. I get compliments for helping and listening to people, and even on my spirituality. But, for a talent??? Not really.
I am flattered by the compliments not because of what it says about me but because of who it comes from. The people who have complimented me are all people I consider interesting, smart, talented and accomplished. If they like what I do then I feel gifted... because I value their thoughts and opinions. I don't want to let them down. I guess I was intimidated by the positive feedback.
The second problem was that I wasn't comfortable being as open as I usually am. In the past few months I've let go of some people who were not helping me move along on a positive path. Some were friends that have been in my life for a very long time, some were people I worked with spiritually and some were ex's who simply wanted to keep tabs on me but would never be more then just on the fringe of my life. I didn't want to make it easy for those people who didn't treat me well enough for me to be a part of their lives to stay informed. If they can't be kind to me, value me, include me then why should they KNOW me?
Once I faced these two issues writing again became easier.
I love writing and THAT should be the only thing I worry about. Why people read what I write isn't supposed to be the point. If people enjoy and relate to what I put out there then it's just one more blessing in my world. And, if they don't like what I put out there... well then, they don't have to log on, do they? I don't work for a newspaper, I don't have to write on deadline or be PC about things... no need for fact checking. And, Oprah certainly can't call me onto her show and dis me for my words. As long as I stick to my own moral compass I don't need to worry about getting lost.
So, here's to me being ME and doing what I love.
Wish me well...